Top o’ the Mornin’ to Ya!
TLDR: In this heartfelt reflection, I share how abandoning my personal agenda during coaching sessions has led to remarkable breakthroughs for my clients. By focusing on connection and letting the Holy Spirit guide conversations, I’ve witnessed transformative results simply by creating space for authentic discovery.
What?
The snow has melted, and the roads have cleared up, making my morning commute to the bus stop easier. But what’s truly transformative has been my recent coaching experiences. The last two people I coached experienced major breakthroughs just during our introductory conversations – before we even established session goals!
This happened because I’ve been practicing a new approach: true coaching. Instead of coming with a consulting or training mindset, I’m opening conversations with simple questions like “What would you like to talk about today?” and then listening deeply while helping clients gain clarity around their challenges.
I’ve noticed that by removing my need to deliver an answer and being present, clients discover solutions within themselves through their connection with the Holy Spirit, even before formally defining session outcomes.
Why?
I’m sharing this because I’ve realized the power of letting go of control in leadership. I’ve always blended coaching (helping others find answers within) with mentoring (offering expertise and direction). While both have value, I’ve discovered that pure coaching – helping someone connect with God and their own life learnings – creates faster, deeper transformation.
As we develop as leaders, especially Kingdom Family Leaders who understand the importance of blessing ourselves first, we become more aware of our patterns. We recognize when we’re projecting our perceptions onto situations rather than truly listening and serving.
Lesson
Don’t let your agenda or what you think needs to be done blow up everything. I’m really good at going in with my perceptions, projections, and agenda and potentially ruining things. With coaching growth, I’ve learned it’s not about me. It’s not the first time. . . re-learned!
It takes tremendous discipline to remove mentorship from coaching – to ask questions without projecting anything into the conversation. But removing my agenda has multiplied results dramatically.
The focus of Kingdom family leadership is first blessing ourselves, understanding our needs and typical blocking patterns. As we grow, we recognize when we need space to think or just that one question that creates a mindset shift and discovery.
Apply
Where could you leave your agenda behind? Where could you set aside your perceptions and projections to become a better leader for those you serve? Consider areas in your life, family, or business where your predetermined ideas might be limiting growth and transformation.
Practice listening first and speaking second. Create space for others to discover their own solutions through thoughtful questions rather than immediate answers. Watch how this shifts the quality of your relationships and leadership impact.
You be blessed.
Breaking Free from Agenda: A Coaching Transformation
