Top o’ the Mornin’ to Ya!
When three simple words completely shatter everything you believed about yourself and your future, that’s the power of a true paradigm shift. It’s not just part of transformation – it IS the transformation.
For years, I carried a belief that felt like a death sentence to my dreams. Coming out of sexual addiction and the wreckage of my choices, I had convinced myself: “My sin is so bad, I can never be a father or even a good husband.” This wasn’t just a passing thought – it was my core identity. I had buried every dream of marriage and family so deep I convinced myself they didn’t exist anymore.
Then I met Leah. She was divorced with three kids, had a psychology degree, and somehow I found courage to share my whole story with her. All of it – the addiction, recovery, shame, fear, everything I’d kept hidden behind my perfectionist mask. I braced myself for rejection, for confirmation of what I already believed about myself.
Instead, she looked at me and said three words that changed everything: “That explains it.” No disgust, no rejection, not confirmation of my unworthiness – just understanding. She said those words in reference to my personality quirks, my perfectionism, my desperate effort to maintain my mask. With her psychology background and full understanding of my story, she simply said, “That explains it. Now you can move on and be whole and complete.”
That moment was like opening a full can of ideas and dreams that had been buried. Suddenly I could see myself as her husband, envision being father to her three kids, dream about the family we might build together – which turned out to include two more children of our own.
Paradigm shifts aren’t just part of the process – they ARE the entire process. A paradigm shift is when your fundamental way of seeing reality completely changes in an instant. When you change your mind, you’re still operating from the same framework – just rearranging furniture in the same house. But a paradigm shift is like discovering you’ve been living in a tiny shack when there’s been a mansion available all along.
For Kingdom Family Leaders, paradigm shifts often happen around your deepest shame and greatest fears. Maybe you’ve believed “I’m not qualified to lead because of my past” or “I have to choose between business success and being present for my family.”
A true paradigm shift looks like this: Instead of seeing struggles as disqualifications, you recognize them as credentials. Instead of viewing brotherhood as weakness, you understand it as God’s design for strength.
Identify one limiting belief you’ve carried about yourself as husband, father, or leader. Write it down exactly as you think it. Now ask: “What if this belief isn’t true? What if my story actually qualifies me for something greater?” Write down what would be possible if that old paradigm was completely false.
You be blessed!
Three Words That Shattered Everything: The Power of Paradigm Shifts
