Top o’ the Mornin’ to Ya!
TLDR: Discover how to break free from the distracting thoughts that prevent deep listening during conversations. Learn practical techniques to quiet your mind and truly connect with others, just as Scripture encourages us to be “quick to listen” (James 1:19).
What?
While walking my dog, I reflected on how my mind used to work during conversations. Rather than truly listening, I’d be consumed with planning what to say next, wondering how to appear impressive, or thinking about how to make people like me better. This constant internal chatter meant I wasn’t actually present with the person speaking to me. During a recent podcast interview, I had an idea to share a Bible verse, but I intentionally dismissed the thought so I could fully listen to my host. When the opportunity to share the verse came up naturally later, I momentarily forgot it because I had been so focused on listening rather than planning my response.
Why?
This story highlights a common struggle many of us face: the battle between genuine presence and self-focused distraction. When we’re constantly planning our next response or worrying about how we’re being perceived, we miss the opportunity for authentic connection. True relationships require us to be fully present and engaged, which requires mental discipline and self-control – qualities the Bible specifically mentions as fruits of the Spirit.
Lesson
Learning to quiet your mind during conversations is similar to meditation – not in an Eastern religious sense, but in the biblical practice of mental discipline and self-control. It’s about training yourself to notice distracting thoughts and gently dismiss them rather than entertaining them. This skill allows you to give others your complete attention, which communicates value and builds deeper connections. True listening is an act of love that puts others before yourself.
Apply
Challenge yourself to practice intentional listening this week. When you notice your mind wandering during a conversation, gently dismiss those thoughts and refocus on the person speaking. Write down a specific example of a time when you failed to listen well because your mind was elsewhere. Acknowledge this common human struggle with humility, and commit to improving. Remember, it’s better to forget what you were going to say because you were listening than to miss what someone else is saying because you’re planning your response.
You be blessed.
Distractions vs. Deep Listening: How to Actually Hear What Others Are Saying
